Wish You Gone

Frankly speaking, I hate all Malaysian drivers, be it cars or bikes. You drive slow on the fast lane when people are in a rush. You turn without signals. You cut queues at the toll. You can't bloody stay in line and cause more traffic. You just gotta zigzag scaring the shit out of others. You just gotta stick close to the front drivers to tell them to get lost. You just gotta turn on high lights to irritate the drivers in front at night. You just gotta driver faster when you see others signalling to turn to avoid slowing down. You just gotta forget the bloody laws when driving. You just gotta go even more slower taking your own sweet time at the slow lane (going below 40 KMPH is over the board). You just gotta stay in the middle of two lane. Bottom word, you like to bloody endanger other peoples life. If you want to kill yourself, there are tons of way. There are practically more than 101 way to kill yourself without having to endanger others on the road. So fuck off.

Getting stuck in a traffic for an entire hour just from Kepong (Desa Parkcity area onwards) to SS2, getting into a fucked up accident at Bulatan Rothman in SS2 thanks to another dumb driver (well I'm not hurt cuz if I am, I wouldn't be blogging this), end of class, coming back home, another dumb bitch just gotta make me ALMOST get into another accident. What the hell?

Coming to class, nobody to show up, no information given, no questions asked. Class delayed like hell. Nothing being taught in class. Time being wasted. What the hell?

I'm having such a bad time and end of this month surely prove to be a real messed up time for me. Well, doesn't matter. Things just gotta get more 'lovely' with all the uncooperative people around. Lovely, isn't? I should have been a selfish bitch at the start and why should I even give compassion towards those that does not think for me at all? I'm all talk about being a bitch but never acting like one, I guess I should be a total bitch and I seriously do, wish you will get fucked up and gone in the end. Don't rely on me anymore and fuck you all Malaysia drivers, including myself at times. The least I do is signal, bitch.

Rewrite

Yeah, you’d probably this of Asian KungFu Generation (Ajikan) song Riraito [リライト]. No, it’s not. Ugh, I don’t even know how to properly put this in words. It’s a massive jumble of different feelings into a small matchbox. Because of one simple incident, because of the high expectations, I felt like it was crushing me up until now.

I’m not trying to blame anyone. I’m trying hard not to. I just can’t help it. When one is not cooperative, I start to blame like hell. When one starts to escape the work, I blame like hell. Yeah, I study management but my management is hellish. What the heck, it’s just one of my presentation but everything just screws up and when the lecturer told us to redo it, I’m totally crushed. Wait, not even there, the beginning of the presentation, I’m already crushed. I wanted to hide in a corner and nobody finds me or dig myself a hole and jump into it that moment. Everything is just wrong. It’s already been 4 days after that incident, yet I still feel the pressure of it. Another chance was given to present again on Monday and seriously, I’m hoping that if the word redo it comes out again, I’ll just have a heart attack or whatever attacks and die on the spot. Let them suffer the guilt. I couldn’t be bothered with people who does not know what they want and people who does not know how to do their shits properly.

See, I’m off blaming people again when I myself can’t lead properly. What is so hard with doing a presentation in front of people you’ve already known quite well? I’ve no freaking idea. No, I don’t have the confidence at times that I do well, but I just had the confidence to talk my way out. Smile and if I don’t know, tell them I’ll get it to them later. The least is I admit or shit, do your research more importantly before you freaking present.

Crap, that song did indeed play itself when I’m writing this. Guess I should rename the title. English version though.

You Feel Me?

It’s crazy when one is trying to understand the other. I mean, you are not the worm in their stomach or their brain, how can you possibly know what one thinks unless you’re a freakin’ mind reader? I doubt the existence anyway. Ability the read body language, yes, but not the mind. Yet, that’s not my point. Everyone is actually a simple person. The only part that makes them complicated, is when they themselves wanna be complicated. But, that’s what being a human is all about. Isn’t?

Like for now, I was actually thinking on, how the hell can guys tend to be so insensitive towards their partners’ feeling? At times when the partner were probably dropping hints (either too-freaking-obvious or you’re-freakin’-blind-if-you-can’t-read-this hints) that they want to show them something that the partner is happy of but yet wanted to give the surprise feel to it, the guy just DON’T bloody get it. This is from a girl point of view. Simple, no? We do not like to be obvious, we like you guys to BE OBSERVANT TO SHOW YOU FREAKIN’ CARE ENOUGH to realize what changed or happened to us. Girls do not trust words. Girls trust only when the guy shows that they notice, not when guy are going after the girl, but keeps the observant mode on till the day death-do-us-part and everything will be happy happy jolly jolly with the girls. Ok, that is my biased side since hey, you can’t blame me since I’m born a female. I’m not entirely biased at the same time

At the same time, because of the whole be-observing-will-you thing from the girls, the guy find it as a pain in the ass and they’d rather like things to be simple and straight forward. Show-and-tell-me-and-stop-making-me-guess-damnit is always there in the end when a relationship goes to more than a year, if you’re lucky, later than that. When the two thoughts clashes, that’s why the guy would always think, why on earth are the females so complicated?! Well, the guy is tired from work, had a beer or two with the buddies after work, came home to look for comfort at home with the family and wife (prolly in bed most of the time, that would be their thoughts) and the guy were given a can-you-see-what-i-did-to-my-hair-today session by the girl (or kids if they were married), a blank look will most likely be given and the bed or TV would be more attractive than the girl is. Be aware ladies!

I guess, this is the most general argument that happens between couples and when they do not discuss but blames each other for not understanding, please get the drain unclogged so that the word relationship can go down there. So girls, why can’t we be straight forward sometimes to give the guys a break and guys, why can’t you be observant sometimes to make us girls know that you care? Everything is so obvious and simple. Why making things hard? You feel me?